The Deep Dive

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4: A Dance with Lions: Reflections on Identity, Power, and Union

In this episode of The Deep Dive, we reflect on the nature of identity, power dynamics, and the complexities of union within relationships. Drawing on the metaphor of wolves, lions, and stags, we explore the subtle balance between strength, vulnerability, and the delicate interplay of masculine and feminine energies.


A Dance with Lions: Reflections on Identity, Power, and Union

I grew up around wolves but I'm not a predator, and yet I married a lioness. I am the prized stag, the bull, the towering elephant, and she is my pride.

This powerful metaphor invites us into a world where identity is fluid, shaped by both environment and intrinsic nature. To grow up around wolves is to be forged in a landscape of survival, instinct, and competition. Wolves, often seen as symbols of cunning, strength, and cooperation, evoke images of a pack—where the fight for dominance and survival defines one's existence. But what happens when one is raised among wolves yet feels detached from the predatory nature that surrounds them?

In this context, the speaker’s claim, ‘I am not a predator’, is a profound statement of self-realisation. It is a recognition that despite being immersed in an environment where aggression and dominance may be prized, one’s true essence may lie elsewhere. This reflects the idea that environment influences us, but it does not define us. The distinction between growing up with wolves and not becoming a predator highlights the conscious decision to reject the behaviours and values of one’s surroundings when they do not align with one’s core identity.

In mythological terms, wolves represent the untamed forces of nature. They survive by instinct and strength, often linked with both freedom and danger. Yet, the speaker’s rejection of this predatory role demonstrates a different kind of power, one that emerges from choice and self-awareness rather than survivalist instinct. Philosopher Simone Weil once said, 'Liberty, taking the word in its concrete sense, consists in the ability to choose.’ The speaker has chosen to rise above the primal nature of the wolves, not through a denial of strength, but through a refined understanding of what true power looks like. True strength, in this instance, is shown through self-determination, not through predation.

Despite this self-awareness, the speaker goes on to describe their union with a lioness, a creature that undeniably represents strength, power, and fierce protection. The lioness, known for her role in the pride as a hunter and protector, brings a different dynamic to the relationship. This juxtaposition creates a vivid image: the speaker as the stag, the bull, the towering elephant, each symbolising strength, nobility, and leadership, but not predation. These symbols represent animals that are often admired for their grace, stature, and dominance, but also for their lack of malice.

In many ways, this union between the speaker and the lioness signifies the delicate balance between masculine and feminine energies. The lioness, while a fierce protector and hunter, is also nurturing, loyal, and part of a collective pride. The stag and the bull, though powerful, do not seek to conquer; they exist in harmony with their environment, embodying a calm and steady force that complements the lioness’s fiery nature. This echoes the ancient Taoist concept of Yin and Yang, where opposing forces are not in conflict, but in harmony, with each one completing the other. The speaker embodies qualities of steadfastness and grace, while the lioness brings boldness and a protective energy, together creating a complete and balanced union.

The use of animal metaphors here enriches our understanding of relationship dynamics. In modern culture, the depiction of male and female roles can often become simplistic, with power being associated primarily with dominance or submission. However, the speaker’s imagery pushes against this narrative. The relationship between the stag and the lioness is not a contest for dominance but a mutual recognition of value. The stag, often hunted in myths and legends, remains majestic and powerful in its own right. In this sense, the speaker embraces a form of masculinity that is secure enough to admire and cherish the lioness's strength without feeling threatened by it.

This union of contrasting yet complementary energies can also be seen as a reflection of the speaker's internal balance. To marry a lioness is not just a reflection of external dynamics but a metaphor for the marriage of the masculine and feminine within. Carl Jung, the Swiss psychiatrist, often spoke of the importance of integrating one’s Anima (feminine) and Animus (masculine) as part of achieving psychological wholeness. The speaker's acknowledgment of their lioness wife as ‘my pride’ illustrates this inner harmony, where both strength and vulnerability coexist, forming a complete self.

Ultimately, the speaker’s metaphor reveals an understanding of identity as both relational and dynamic. While they may have grown up around wolves, the speaker has chosen a different path, defining themselves not by the predatory instincts of their past but by the strength of their inner resolve. Their marriage to a lioness reflects a deep understanding of partnership, one built not on dominance but on mutual respect and admiration.

In conclusion, this metaphorical dance between the stag and the lioness invites us to consider how identity, strength, and union are constructed. It challenges conventional notions of power and reveals that true strength lies not in predation or conquest but in self-awareness, mutual respect, and the balance of energies. The speaker’s journey from the wolves to the stag, the bull, and the elephant reminds us that we have the power to define ourselves and our relationships not by the expectations of the world around us, but by the truths we discover within.